In honor of this month of love and romance, I’m kicking off a series entitled “Love in the Time of COVID.” My team, composed of a personal stylist, hair and makeup artists, and online dating profile writer, and I will share our best tips to help you find love and success in online dating.

“This was supposed to be the year to meet my special someone…. but then COVID-19 ruined that.”

I’ve sadly heard these words from all too many of my online dating clients, but COVID doesn’t have to mean an end to your dating life. Yes, the number of opportunities to meet someone in person has decreased, but that also means everyone has flocked to online dating sites, so you know exactly where to go to meet everyone else who is single during the pandemic.

While online dating is not new for most people, going on virtual dates via your phone or computer’s camera is a whole new experience. As a professional photographer, my whole job is to make people look good on camera, so I wanted to share my expertise to help you look your best on a virtual date.

Before you dig into my tips and tricks below, I’d like to acknowledge that this will take a little time and effort. I’m a firm believer that anything worth doing is worth doing right and some of my tips do require some initial work or purchases. Most of the hard work, however, only needs to be done once and I’m confident that the extra effort will pay dividends in the long run.

If at any point a little voice pops up in your head and tells you it’s not cool to look like you’re trying hard on a date, don’t listen to it. Switch it around—would you be excited to go on a date with someone who seemed unprepared and uninvested in the success of your date? Or who looked less attractive than their photos because of poor lighting, weird camera angles, and a messy, distracting backdrop? No, you wouldn’t. The same applies to you. The care and attention you put into preparing yourself and your environment let your date know you’re a catch and will undoubtedly lead to better dates.

Set the Scene

The first order of business is to choose a location for your virtual date. If your date was actually there with you in person, where would it make sense for you two to sit? In your living room, at the kitchen table, on your patio, etc.? Choose somewhere comfortable and inviting. A word of caution—while your bed might be the most comfortable place for you to sit, setting up there could send an unintended message for a first date.

Once you’ve identified possible date locations, take a look around. Does the background look too busy, cluttered, messy, or perhaps too austere? Don’t be afraid to do a little staging and straightening up. Incorporate some artwork, a bookshelf, or a plant into the background. Be aware of what might be visible in the background—toss those empty water bottles on the counter in the recycling and those dirty socks on the floor in the laundry basket.

Lighting, Lighting, Lighting

Lighting is another important factor to consider as you select your virtual date location. Natural light is always the most flattering, as it evens out skin tone, removes under eye shadows, and decreases the appearance of wrinkles. If your date is taking place during the day, set yourself up facing a window with the camera facing away from the window light. Extra points if you hang a sheer white curtain over the window, which diffuses the light and makes it even more flattering. You want to illuminate your entire face and avoid harsh shadows on either side of your face. You especially want to avoid putting your back to a window as the camera will calibrate for the bright light and turn you into a faceless silhouette.

*Here’s an example of what not to do. My back is to the window…*

*…which confuses the laptop camera’s automatic brightness adjustment feature and throws my face into shadow.*

*This pullback shot shows an ideal setup. The laptop camera is eye level and I’m set up facing the window with sheer curtains diffusing the light…*

*…which creates an evenly lit, flattering light on my face.*

If your home doesn’t have great natural light or your date is taking place after the sun has gone down, you’ll have to do a little more to make sure you’re well lit. I recommend investing in a ring light. There are many affordable stand or clip-on cell phone options. As much as you can, avoid mixing light sources as that will create different color temperatures on camera—without getting too technical, it’s not as flattering and will mess with the color of your skin.

*Here’s an example of how to set up a ring light stand for evening calls or if you don’t have access to good natural light.*

*While the natural light is preferable, the ring light is still flattering and makes it easy to see what I look like.*

*An example of harsh light from the side*

Ditch the Zoom Background

While a Zoom background can be a good idea for work calls where you don’t want to share as much personal information, the point of a date is to share more about yourself. More importantly, using a Zoom background on a date could be interpreted as an attempt to hide or conceal something.

While you’re in the Zoom settings, go ahead and turn on the “touch up my appearance” filter.

Camera Setup

The most flattering angle is at eye level or just slightly above (especially if you’re worried about a double chin). If you’re using a desktop computer and the webcam is not at eye level, it may be worth investing in a portable webcam that you can set up exactly where you want. If you’re using a laptop, place it on top of a few books or boxes to get the height just right or purchase a laptop stand. If you’re using your phone or iPad, prop it up against something or put it in a cell phone stand. (Many ring light stands come up with cell phone holders built-in.)

Eliminate Distractions

We’ve all seen the funny videos of the parent in their towel walking past their child’s virtual school. Don’t let yourself or your date be the butt of that joke—pun intended. If you live with anyone else, let them know you have a video call or put up a do not disturb sign. Feed or take your dog out before the call starts. Turn off or silence desktop or phone notifications, just as you would put your phone on silent for an in-person date. Not only do distractions or unwanted notifications risk interrupting the flow of your date, but they also send the message that your date is not that important.

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Nothing kills the mood like technical difficulties. Give yourself ample time to make sure your software is up to date, your WiFi connection is working, and your phone or computer is fully charged. While you’re at it, grab a charging cable just in case the date runs long and your battery is low. I like to get fully set up at least 15 minutes before “showtime” to make sure I can easily connect and check how I and my background look on camera.

Go Get ‘Em Tiger!

I hope these tips and tricks help you take your online dating game to the next level! Over the next few weeks, I’ll be sharing tips for men and women from my personal stylist on how to dress for casual and dressy virtual dates!

If all of this sounds good and you’re ready to start filling your calendar with virtual dates, but you aren’t receiving enough interest in your profile, let me and my team help! The quality of your photos is the biggest determining factor as to whether potential dates swipe right or left. Do your photos show the best, most attractive version of yourself, or could they use some work? We are a full-service photography studio that specializes in taking the best photos you’ve ever seen of yourself to help get you more and better quality matches.